\

Cheers to a Blog Post NOT About Being Engaged, Married or Pregnant.

I’m back. Wow, I can’t believe it’s been almost two and half years since my last post. I am seriously laughing out loud reading all of my 22-year old posts. I turned 25 this week, so now I’m mature, I’ve got it all figured out……dot……dot…..dot……

False. I have nothing figured out necessarily, but that’s ok I’ve got time, I think? I am pretty proud of not getting married or pregnant in the meantime, though.

So – why did it take me so freakin’ long to get my shit together and get back to writing this? As some of my closer friends understand, I’m going through somewhat of a crossroads in my life. Nothing that serious, but enough where I’ve realized I would really like to focus and make more time for the things that make me happy, and that I’m passionate about. Those things happen to include reading, writing and being active, of course.

I’m going to try really hard to update this regularly! Really, really, hard! Unless I get distracted by important things like napping, or watching The Office, or staring blankly at the wall. 

I don’t care who is about to roll their eyes at me right now for saying this, but being in your twenties is fucking WEIRD. Especially mid-twenties. For me, this is a time where I feel the need to explore new interests and goals and focus on a career rather than a job (shall I refer to my previous post about all of  the 16 or so jobs I had growing up…). I feel so young at heart, but I also have to be responsible to a point because I have to pay rent and bills and student loans and my $160/month gym membership! Life is hard! So hard!

But it’s also all so EXCITING too! So many options! I’m not tied down to a family where I have to make joint decisions; I can basically do whatever the fuck I want. I can be so incredibly autonomous in all of my choices.  I am lucky enough to have a job right now where I don’t have to worry about money and affording said rent. I can hide out in my apartment all night drinking boxed wine and watching porn, crappy television if I feel like it.

Sometimes, especially recently, all of these endless choices and options are scary and overwhelming! I wonder if I’m making the right decisions, and I’m afraid of making a mistake, or regretting a certain path I end up taking. I’m probably wrong, but it seems like I don’t have all of the time in the world anymore to figure it out because I’m “growing up” ughhhhhh. UGHHHHHHH.

And then I realize…

I’m an asshole.

 I say things to myself , like “Omg, Katy, what are you going to do next? Wow, all these decisions and options are so HARD, there is so much POTENTIAL in life, what if I end up unsatisfied??” sad face, crying face, frustrated face.

Then I think OH YEAH YOU DUMBASS

You live in a place where you have the opportunity to even have fucking options and choices and make your own decisions and forge a path for your own life. That suuuuucksssss. Oh nooooooo.

People would die for the opportunities I have in front of me, that we all have, the privilege to even make your own decisions when it comes to life and love and beyond. That’s when I remember I am so incredibly lucky and have so many amazing things that others only dream of! Everyone reading this post is blessed, seriously, you are.  Life is about perspective, and there are tons of people in our world struggling to even stay alive, so stop being an ASSHOLE and be grateful for everything you have!! Right now, be grateful! Do it!

One of the most important things I’ve learned about myself over the past couple of years is how far I’ve come from being a young derelict and how I have a strong calling to give back to the world somehow. Don’t ask me how, because I haven’t figured it out yet. But I’ve taken some initiative on the matter so far, and I expect that to continue in some sense over the next few years of my life. We’ll see, who knows. See: strong theme of being confused about what I want to “be when I grow up”.

Well one thing I know for sure! When things are weird, you need to focus on the positive parts of your life that you know make you happy. Whether that’s family, friends, or THE GYM! YEAH!

I have been making sure to carve out time to workout because it is my number one stress reliever. They say home is where the heart is, well my heart is in exercising and whenever I get ready for a workout I am so calm and comfortable and focused. I feel so accomplished once I’m finished, too. There are many things in your life you cannot control, but making time for yourself is something that you can, completely. And then you can eat a cheeseburger, because they are delicious and should make you happy too.

OK, enough about my stupid problems. This was my workout:

- 5 minute warm-up on the TM

- Squats: 5 x 5 @ 225pounds; that’s 90 pounds on each side of a 45lb barbell.

- Deadlifts: 5 x 5 @ 225pounds

- Lunges: 3 x 15 using a 90pound pre-weighted bar (the ones you don’t have to add weights to, they’re just already that heavy)

- (More) Lunges: 3 x 20 holding a 20 pound dumbbell and adding a twist

- Hanging Leg Raises: 3 x 20; no weight just my fat ass (kidding!....)

- Renegade Rows: 3 x 10; using 20 pound dumbbells – this is when you’re performing rows in a plank/pushup position

Then I ran home quickly to avoid the Back Bay molester that’s been hiding out in my neighborhood – creepy!